Kay Pelham

This is installment two of remembrances of 10 years ago. Here is exciting installment one. On this day 10 years ago Jack had his first visit to my family’s farm about 70 miles from the big city. We drove out there with two other friends to spend a peaceful Saturday away from the hustle and bustle. On the drive over and up I learned some surprising things about my friend Jack. The subject of The Beverly Hillbillies came up and I was a bit embarrassed thinking that Jack was too high-brow to know The BHs. However, he was quite familiar with them, even knowing the minor character of Cousin Pearl! And then The Muppet Movie made it’s way into the conversation and Jack said it was one of his favorites and my heart went tippy-tippy because the movie holds special memories for me of my brother James who had passed away 3 years before this. I was learning that what I had thought was this high-falutin’ classical singing man was actually a normal guy. Although we had grown up in very different parts of the country, we had common memories.

At the farm we enjoyed visiting with family, singing with family, and then walking around the farm on a beautiful summer day. On the way down to the creek I impulsively reached down and picked a daisy and handed it to my friend and sang, “I’ll give you a daisy a day, dear.” And thus it has become known as our “daisy” day.

On the drive back to the urban jungle, Jack said he could see why family was special to me. He also commented  that he did not think I needed to “cut the apron strings” (as I had been told by people that thought I was too connected to my family), but that what I did need was my own apron. My friend had a vision that I would be married and have my own family. He just didn’t know it would be him —- yet.

Yesterday, on a long drive away from our current urban jungle, Jack took this picture of a field of daisies, not connecting that it was the 10th anniversary of our “daisy day.”  This particular area was covered with them. This was a very, very small portion.

In case you’re not familiar with the song….

Sorry, I don’t have a picture of me in an apron, but in the spirit of what Jack meant that day, metaphorically speaking, here it is.

Maybe one day I’ll have fun giveways here, but for now I’m sending you over to Parent at the Helm for their June, 2011 Book Giveway. What Really Matters by David H. Albert & Joyce Reed (Introduction by Wendy Priesnitz, Foreword by John Taylor Gatto) – “A treasury of intelligent, penetrating, heartfelt, and often good-humored conversations about children and education. David Albert and Joyce Reed are deeply experienced homeschooling parents and a delightful pair of writers. In this collection of essays, they share their thoughts and experiences, playing off each others’ experiences with and ruminations about society, schools, children and learning…and showing by example how children and young people thrive when trusted to learn from life.”

So head on over and follow the directions. If I’m not the winner this month, I hope it’s you!

Next year will our 10th wedding anniversary. As we go through this year, we are coming upon all the 10th anniversaries of significant events that led up to our engagement and marriage. Jack and I met in late 1998 and were merely acquaintances for the next few years as we were part of the same church and worked on a few church/charitable music events together during that time. In 2001 circumstances drew us closer together and we became true friends. We shared lots of talks and emails about what concerned us with life. Memorial Day was the 10th anniversary of his driving back from a family vacation in Florida straight to my Nashville apartment. He was beginning to see that coming home seemed to mean seeing me 🙂 And today’s anniversary? On that day Jack had to make a pretty big emotional decision and when it was over, where did he go? To my apartment. He put his head on my shoulder and cried and watched Shanghai Noon with me and my roommate.

Here’s an interesting note about Jack and those emotions. In the past, Jack was quite prolific with poems and songs and one-liners (the type you see on inspirational posters). Many of these poems and songs were written about and to women he was dating. I got a few poems in the beginning, but never a song. I asked him early on why he stopped writing the poems and songs and he responded, “Because I’m happy now.” If his poems came from uncertainty and sadness, I’ll take the security and happiness over poems and songs any day. Wouldn’t you?

In keeping with the Always Learning theme of this blog, a whole lot of learning was going on at that time. Somebody was learning that there must be a reason that he kept coming back to the same person whenever he had something meaningful to share or a shoulder to cry on. And someone else was learning that she really liked providing that ear and shoulder.

“There is a friend who sticks closer than a brother”